From Devastation to Determination: Grieving A Divorce Or Breakup

Grieving a breakup or divorce can be just as devastating as grieving the death of a close friend or love one. However, when grieving a divorce, you’re mourning the death of that marriage. Although, the grieving process for (breakup or divorce) one person may be sooner than the other there’s no timeframe to how long one may grieve. But, if you know someone that has gone through the emotions as you, this may help to not feel so alone during the process. Also, never let anyone convince you that your grieving process is too long or not long enough. There may even be someone that was anticipating the breakup or divorce, but one still may be blindsided and/or devastated when that time comes. The stages and the process that one goes through may get difficult at times but with God and/or professional help you can get through it.

I realized when going through my divorce the first stage I went through was shock. When one is in shock, they are experiencing emotional trauma. Your heart is racing, your thinking is off, you’re feeling afraid, upset stomach, and you’re trying to make sense of what just happened. Emotional shock can last for hours, days, or even weeks. However, when going through this type of trauma allow yourself to heal, practice self-compassion, exercise, allow yourself to scream, holler, and cry, cultivate supportive relationships, and accept support. This to shall pass but the next stages will eventually kick in. They may not come in order and the other stages may return but they will come. But, always be open for support. I will talk about stage 2 in the next Devastation to Determination blog.

Author Melnie D. Phillips

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