Being Emotionally Detached And Not Knowing It
Mothers and Daughters, in order to achieve and maintain a healthy relationship with each other there needs to be an internalized love and adoration that you both can relate too. If that unconditional self-love is not there or if it hasn’t been portrayed, then there’s no way you can give something that you haven’t received. In most cases the first relationship that one enters is the relationship with their mother. The mother carries the child for nine months and after birth, the baby is laid on the mom’s chest for that skin to skin contact to warm the baby along with other wonderful benefits.
But, one of the most important benefits is that initial bonding time with the baby which allows the oxytocin levels to increase which normalizes the stress and blood pressure levels. So, bonding with the baby starts inside and immediately outside the womb. However, if there’s a lack of bonding and/or emotional and physical nourishment from the mom/dad, then the baby becomes a child who is emotionally undeveloped. Thus, this is how some mother/daughter relationships are…Emotionally Undeveloped!
Parental love isn’t just a verbal or expressed feeling it also includes behavioral interactions. If love is not shown, then 9 times out of 10 it’s not reciprocated. Sadly, your child will transition into a teen and an adult with the same emotional attention and affection that they’re longing for. Mothers, you may not know that your continual behavioral patterns are due to a lack of self-awareness. If you can’t tolerate stress maturely, always looking for recognition or accolades, you’re acting more like your daughter’s friend than the parent, if you’re abusing or relying on a substance, if you’re selfish, if you can’t maintain healthy relationships, or if your moods are unstable and you’re not aware then you need therapy. Mom, your disconnect could’ve been passed down from your parent(s) and now you’re inflicting the pain and passing it down to your child. The relationship with your daughter(s) should not be destroyed, it should be enjoyed. So, please be aware of your behavior especially if your daughter(s) is always complaining about the treatment they’re receiving and/or your behavior. Because, getting the necessary help that’s needed is just a phone call away.
Author Melanie D. Phillips